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Regret


Misty Copeland by Unknown artist


Regret


/rɪˈɡrɛt/


Definition; feel sad, repentant, or disappointed over (something that one has done or failed to do).


Why does this word of an action drill such deep guilt in our minds. No matter how much we learn to live with it, why does the anxiety of the event live in our minds rent free. 


We all have regrets. No matter how perfect you may believe your life is, sometimes  memories aka over exaggerated flash backs caused mostly by overthinking, lead us to believe that feeling of I shouldda, wouldda or couldda done things a lot differently. Ok maybe we could, but we didnt! So lets move along. Shout out to Beverley Knight for that banger 🙌🏾

We usually have regrets of things we wished we did better. Decisions we wished we took with more thought and advice. We look back and think how different our lives could be if maybe we took a different route but thats not how life works. Unfortunately we cant edit out the stuff we aren't proud of like an Instagram Photo.  


So here is the million dollar question. How do we stop these thoughts from bringing back bad emotions and the lack of movement to move on? 


Ok so just a small disclaimer, before we get into things,  I am not a psychologist nor do I have the minerals to diagnose or put right these feelings but here is what I do. 

I remind myself that know that no matter what happened in the past, some how I’m here today. I'm Happy, Healthy and Thriving HONEY and this is how I got here....

I let go and let God! 

Yep. I know here comes the eye roll, you’ve heard it all before but trust me its harder than it sounds but also really achievable. To really let go and let God takes time and true belief. Belief that you will be able to one day move on and belief that you will be able to believe in the decisions that you are more than capable to make. 


There has been many situations which I’ve been party to and also situations I’ve heard of by friends and family, where I truly believe within that moment, that decision was made and it was the best option, but when you look back and the outcome isn't the one you expected or even practiced for regret hits instantly. I know in that moment we are literally gritting our teeth thinking LORD WHYYYY. Why didn’t I think harder and why didn’t I consider other options more!!! But here it comes the release of the two T’s, Trust and Trauma

Tell yourself; Ok I did wrong or they did me wrong but for my personal growth and peace of mind i’m not going to be petty betty. Im going to learn from it and rise above it because there is no room for regret in this little life! I know that those mistakes will NEVER happen again and guess what if it comes to it. I am woman enough to say sorry, I made a mistake, I am Human! 


Admitting that your wrong is the best way to get rid of Mr Regret. Look people make mistakes, it's human nature. Ok before we get into panic mode thinking what can we do to fix things, lets bring it back a notch. I’m not saying go back 10 years and call all the people you did wrong and pour out a bunch of stale apologies, no. Im saying, be so at peace with yourself that if one day the stars aligned and you saw that person again those emotions of regret and remorse wont rise up because you are in control of your past, present and future to an extent of course. 


Also don’t take on anyone else’s bad choices because guess what? They aren’t yours! People will do them so you do you, especially in your own healing process. 


So leave Mr Regret just like a toxic relationship and try to make peace your wrongs. Throw away all those mental notes and images you had together. There is no room in the cloud of your life trust me. Otherwise it effect your mental health and cant nobody afford that. 


Stand tall with your head held high just like the image of Misty! 


No matter what the you yesterday is never going to be better than the you today! 


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