Hi guys!
I decided that we need to be able to relate to each other! I feel like even in my community we tend to struggle alone and there is just no need. We can all help each other and we don’t need to suffer in silence. I know I’m no therapist but back in the day talking to your sister friends was all the therapy you needed. So Lets bring that back!
OK, first up was my beautiful cousin Kasy. I asked Kasy a few questions and honestly I cried listening to the voice notes. It wasn’t that I didn’t know the answers she was giving but it was because she went through it. It just made me really emotional.
I asked Kasy a few Questions which she answered openly and honestly and honestly I cried at her honesty. I wasn't really sure how I wanted to do this but hopefully you will be able to follow along with this format.
Here goes...
So everyone meet Kasy as pictured above, she is a 32 year old pisces and mum of one. Kasy is my first cousin, her mum and my mum are sisters, and she is the eldest granddaughter. Fun Fact, I look more like her mum than my own *sips tea*. Kasy is known to the state as a single mum but co-parents with son's father 'i wouldn't class myself as a single parent at all my son has an amazing dad' yh shout out to him for real, MY G!!!
So Kasy Tell Me more about you!
I have a four year old son and I am a full time Beauty Lecturer and I am currently working on TWO side businesses. Girlllllll them Money Moves!!! LOL Yaaas b***shh (this is the actual conversation lol). Kasy runs a mobile massage business on the side of her full time job. Be sure to check it out on insta @aura_training_Academy.
Ok Kass Tell us what gives you happiness.
Well theres a few things that gives me happiness and they have changed through the years. I've learned that "things" no longer give me the fulfilment that they used to when I was younger. Now in my Thirties I look forward to waking up in the morning and going to work and being with my son and family. I've learnt not to take these 'little' things for granted.
Kasy this is a personal one now, tell us what your biggest insecurities are
(the response to this one made me cry)
WOW! That is a hard question because I never asked myself this. Jokingly Kasy says Its so much easier to say what I like about myself. Ok Fran I'm going to change this to what I'm most scared about and the answer to that is that I'm most scared about not finding love. Not just love but that soul mate, that bonafide Ride or die person, someone to grow old with. That is what I'm most scared about. Kass I'm sure you will find it one day or it will find you!
You are probably wondering why this made me cry but Its because I know how amazing love is, I want everyone to experience it. Ill go into this later, maybe even in a separate blog.
What is the biggest obstacle you've ever faced?
Where do I start, theres been a few. So not a lot of people know this but after I had my little boy I suffered from Postnatal Depression. You know as part of the Black Community we don't really talk about things and we are just expected to sort of "deal" with things quietly, which at the beginning I tried to do. Luckily, my family were able to see the difference in me and sort of coach me through. I'm truly grateful for them because a lot of people don't even have family as a resource going through that. During the time I just didn't feel how I thought I would feel. You know the feelings that they say you will have or the perfect overwhelming feelings of joy after you have the baby, I just didn't have that. Now looking back i put it down to fear. Like I just had a WHOLE baby! So many fears and worries that I would or wouldn't be enough for him were running through my head at the time. I really didn't know how to process it. Thankfully, through the grace of God, prayers and family I was able to plough myself through it and come out on the other side. I have thee most intelligent, loving son I could have asked for.
Whats your best accomplishment?
My son he is the best thing since sliced bread lol. No also my Career. I had a baby and was still able to hold it down, achieving my PGCE whilst also working full time and looking after my company. Honestly, sometimes I have to pinch myself when I'm lecturing and I'm just so proud of myself. I remember a teacher once told me 'Kasy why don't you just stick to a BTEC course because you are never really going to get it are you'. Erm excuse me! Say what now! Honestly, whether she meant it that way or not, I used it to fuel my journey. Every time I want to give up, that business studies teacher's statement plays in the back of my head and I think you know what Kass you have got this. Someone send her this link please. Brush them shoulders off Kass! No seriously I love when people doubt me, it's just like putting petrol on a fire I will just get bigger. I am so proud of how far I've come and the things I'm doing. And so you should be!
Whats the best piece of advice you've ever received?
I take all advice on, everyone can teach us something. I continually renew and review myself. Wait!.Girl that touched me. RENEW and REVIEW! Say it louder for the people in the back!!! RENEW AND REVIEW GIRL! No honestly My Nan gave the best advice and I always remember the things she said to me. My favourite is 'All that glistens isn't gold'. Its so true, especially at the age I am now I can relate to it so much more. Sometimes I find myself looking at others and I'm like omg you have your sH!t together. LOL, but as much as I compare I realise, yh I'm not married with loads kids etc but I know that everything will come in its time. I just need to focus and work on myself because everything will come in God's time and personally knowing God and putting my faith in him has helped me on my journey.
What advice would you have given to yourself 10 years ago knowing what you know now?
PUT YO SELF FIRST! Its just my character to put myself last and now I know I need to be on Top of that list. Another one would be if you Ain't feeling it don't do it! If Yo Kid Want Go Park and You Don't Wanna Go to The Park, Don't Go To The Damn Park LOL. Kasy is this really your expample LOL! Lord have Mercy lol. No I'm joking but just make decisions based on YOU. Sometimes we need to be first. Selfish to your own needs. Remember there is only one you!
This was so much fun Kass! Honestly you really are inspiring and I hope those reading this get inspired by you. I know its not the full picture of who she is but its a small shell of advice based on her life experiences. If any of you are affected or have been affected on Post Natal Depression please check out the link below. Its not something i've personally been exposed to but I think this website is really supportive for those that need it.
https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/
Thank you Kass and Log in next week for another Special guest interview, with a take on Marriage in the Indian Culture!!!
OMG I cannot wait!!!
Xxx
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